I was folding the fresh kitchen towels \u2013 the new ones with a tiny daisy print \u2013 when my phone buzzed. Four missed calls from Kate, a mate from the office. I thought, probably nothing urgent, and went back to the cupboard, but it buzzed again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEmily, why aren\u2019t you picking up?\u201d Kate was already babbling. \u201cDid you hear Margaret\u2019s birthday is this Saturday?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I froze, towel clutched in my hand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat birthday?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cShe\u2019s turning seventy\u2011five. Sarah rang me, she\u2019s coming with Dave. Margaret sent out invites to everyone two weeks ago.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The towel slipped. Thirty\u2011two years married to James, and I\u2019ve never missed a family gig. Yet here\u2019s Margaret\u2019s big day and I\u2019m not on the list.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cMaybe they just forgot?\u201d I whispered, though I didn\u2019t really believe it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cForgot? Sarah says the guest list is twenty people \u2013 James\u2019s brothers with their wives, even the neighbour from flat five.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I plonked down on a stool. Memories flooded: looking after my mother\u2011in\u2011law after her gallbladder operation, giving up my holiday days so she could get new dentures, watching her grandkids when everyone else was out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019ll tell you why,\u201d Kate went on, \u201cit\u2019s all because of that cake at New Year\u2019s. Remember you bought the wrong one?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cKate, the cake has nothing to do with it. She\u2019s always treated me like an outsider.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The front door slammed \u2013 James had come in, shaking the rain from his hair like a kid. I said a quick goodbye to Kate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
James shook off the water, his eyes crinkling at the corners. Thirty\u2011two years together, and I still felt like the odd one out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cJames, is your mum having a birthday this Saturday?\u201d I tried to keep my voice steady.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He froze by the fridge, not turning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYeah, something\u2019s planned.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhy didn\u2019t you tell me?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
James opened the fridge and stared at the leftovers as if for the first time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cMom doesn\u2019t want a big do. Just the closest family.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cClosest family,\u201d I repeated, echoing him. \u201cAnd I\u2019m not part of that?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEmily, why bring this up now? You know Mum \u2013 she\u2019s got her quirks.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cQuirks?\u201d I felt a surge. \u201cI\u2019ve put up with her quirks for thirty\u2011two years! Those aren\u2019t quirks, James, that\u2019s\u2026 that\u2019s\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I waved my hand, unable to find the right word.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI helped her after the surgery while you were on a work trip. I gave up my holiday so she could get dentures. I looked after the grandkids when Irma was away. Thirty\u2011two years of trying to be a good daughter\u2011in\u2011law. And this is how it ends?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
James rubbed his bridge of the nose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEmily, do we really need to keep tallying every little thing? Who owes who?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m not keeping a score!\u201d My voice trembled. \u201cI just want to feel part of the family. Is that too much?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He let out a deep sigh and sat down.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou\u2019re blowing this out of proportion. Mum just wants a quiet celebration.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cQuiet? For twenty people? Even the neighbour from flat five is invited!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHow does that\u2026?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDoes it matter how?\u201d I grabbed a towel and started wiping the already dry countertop. \u201cThirty\u2011two years, James! What did I do wrong? Tell me!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
James reached for my hand, but I pulled away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEmily, you know Mum still thinks you stole her son away.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cStole him?\u201d I laughed bitterly. \u201cYou were twenty\u2011five when we met, not five!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I remembered the first time I walked into Margaret\u2019s house, trying to impress her with a pie from my grandma\u2019s recipe. She just pursed her lips and said, \u201cWe don\u2019t bake like that in this family.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAll my life,\u201d I went on, \u201cI\u2019ve tried to please her. And what does she do? She told everyone I was raising Daniel wrong, she told my parents I couldn\u2019t cook, and you just stood by, neutral as ever!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo what do you want me to do?\u201d James\u2019s tone grew irritated. \u201cShould I argue with my mum over a party?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNot the party!\u201d I snapped. \u201cThe way she treats me! She\u2019s never considered me part of the family for thirty\u2011two years, and you let it slide!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I turned to the window. The rain was drizzling, grey and dreary, just like my mood.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEmily, stop making a drama out of it,\u201d James said, awkwardly putting his arms around my shoulders. \u201cDo you want me to talk to her? Maybe it\u2019s just a misunderstanding.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cA misunderstanding?\u201d I slipped out of his embrace. \u201cNo, it would have been a misunderstanding if this was the first time. Now it feels like a slap in the gut.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The next few days I moved through a fog. At work I forced a smile, at home I kept quiet. James tried to smooth things over, but every argument only made the sting sharper.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou have no idea how mad she was last year about that cake,\u201d he said one Thursday night over dinner. \u201cMum thinks you did it on purpose.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOn purpose?\u201d I set my fork down. \u201cI went to three bakeries to find a gluten\u2011free cake because she\u2019s allergic!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut you know she only likes meringue, and you got the one with cream.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBecause they were out of meringues!\u201d Tears welled up. \u201cDo you really think I spent half a day hunting for a cake just to get it wrong?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He fell silent, and that silence said more than any words.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Friday evening I knocked on Daniel\u2019s room. He was sprawled on the couch, glued to his phone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDaniel, Grandma\u2019s birthday is coming up.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYeah,\u201d he replied without looking up. \u201cDad told me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd you\u2019re\u2026 going?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He finally glanced at me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cGrandma asked. What, I\u2019m not going to wish her happy birthday?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I nodded, trying to hide my disappointment. Even my son didn\u2019t see the injustice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOf course,\u201d I said quietly. \u201cOf course, I\u2019ll wish her.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Saturday arrived and the house was empty. James and Daniel left early with gifts and flowers. I was left alone, drifting from room to room. In every photo Margaret stood a little apart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I ran my finger along a frame. It was a family picture from five years ago \u2013 Daniel\u2019s wedding. I was in a blue dress, James in a sharp suit, the newlyweds beaming. Margaret looked as if she\u2019d been forced to drink vinegar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEven on a day like this,\u201d I whispered to the photo. \u201cEven at my grandson\u2019s wedding.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I recalled how my mother\u2011in\u2011law had pulled James aside, loud enough for everyone to hear, and said, \u201cAt least my grandson married a decent girl, unlike some.\u201d James stayed silent, as always.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
That evening James and Daniel came back, a little tipsy, smelling of the expensive perfume Margaret always wore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHow was it?\u201d I asked, trying to keep my tone neutral.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cGreat!\u201d James flopped into a chair. \u201cMum was thrilled. You should have seen her light up when we\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He stopped, noticing the look on my face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSorry, Emily. I didn\u2019t think.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Daniel shuffled awkwardly in the hallway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI think I\u2019ll go to bed,\u201d he muttered, disappearing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSay hi to Mum for me,\u201d James added after a pause.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHi?\u201d My insides clenched. \u201cShe remembered I exist?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cEmily, come on\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNo, you come on!\u201d I couldn\u2019t hold back. \u201cStop pretending everything\u2019s fine. Your mother humiliated me again! And you just stand by?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI do care,\u201d James said, standing. \u201cI just don\u2019t want to be stuck in the middle.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat are we both?\u201d I cut in. \u201cFinish your sentence! What are we both?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He rubbed his temples. \u201cYou\u2019re both too emotional. You\u2019re making a mountain out of a molehill.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAh, I see,\u201d I gave a bitter smile. \u201cSo my pain is just \u2018making a mountain out of a molehill\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I turned and slammed the bedroom door.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ten days passed. James and I spoke coldly, business<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"